On Division and Black Lives Matter
People are precious. Relationships are precious. In times of uncertainty, fear, and hardship, it is most often the relationships we have with the people God has put in our lives that get us through and bring real and lasting change. I pray that this post will be seen in that spirit.
My mentor in college was very different than me. He was a Democrat. He was a man. He was nearing retirement age. He was white, but his wife was black and they were married at a time when that was much more controversial than it is now. When we met, I was the vice-chairman of College Republicans. We had many differences, but I am so thankful that he did not treat me the way I see people treating each other today. He cared about me, he offered me a job as his assistant, he and his wife welcomed me into their home, and they treated me with love and respect. We had many things in common. We loved politics and debating, we loved southern food, we loved justice and fairness, and we were concerned about people of all races in our country and how we interacted with each other and the government. He challenged me to know my stuff and to be the best conservative Republican woman I could possibly be because he understood where we differed and what we had in common.
Obviously people are very divided in their opinions right now. What hurts me the most is that I so often see people divided because they misrepresent those who they believe are on "the other side" of the issues.
Despite having a degree in political science, I rarely post about politics and current events. Social media is THE WORST PLACE to discuss these types of things. We say things on social media that we would never say to people's faces because when we are face to face we are met with the awareness of another person's humanity and dignity. In addition, studies have shown that political Facebook posts don't actually change minds (ironically making this post almost pointless). Despite this, in case there is anyone who would consider these things, I want to make a few points:
1) There are many people, black and white, who very much believe that black lives matter, but who do not want to be associated with the political organization Black Lives Matter, because they do not agree with their political agenda. I would encourage you to check out the "13 Guiding Principles of Black Lives Matter." If you agree with their agenda, by all means support them, but please understand that other people are not comfortable with the things they promote beyond the affirmation of the value of black life.
2) Many people, black and white, who have problems with the term "white privilege" are not just suffering from "white fragility." There are many people who would affirm the current definition given, but who also think that the constant use of this term is counterproductive for race relations and fear that it will cause black youths to internalize the message that the odds are so stacked against them that it will be impossible to succeed in an age where so many people have worked so hard for the possibility of black economic upward mobility.
3) Social media silence is not silence. I can speak about most of these other things calmly, but this is the point where I have to check my anger and try to keep things under control. Racial injustices were fought long before social media existed and many people, including myself, feel that social media is THE WORST PLACE to try to change hearts and minds. I have never been one to shy away from conversations about race, but I would rather talk to people in person or on the phone. I would rather be considered racist by people who have self-admittedly just woken up to the issue of race in America than reduce my black friends to pawns in a game of virtue signaling. I pray that I have lived in a way that has affirmed the dignity of black lives every day, and if I have not I am sincerely sorry, because that is a much greater sin than failing to use a hashtag.
4) To my white friends who have recently taken an interest in race relations: Black people are not a monolith. Black people are people. They have lots of different opinions on everything you can possibly have opinions on. If you have woken up by reading books/blog posts/whatever from only one school of black thought, your understanding of the world that you think you have woken up to might be skewed.
5) I have noticed a trend in Facebook posting about looting and rioting. Most (not all) of those who condemn people who speak out against it tend to be the people who have lived lives of economic/social privilege. I find it incredibly hypocritical when people would re-post articles about food deserts, but vilify people who care about neighborhood stores being destroyed in areas where many people need to have their basic needs met in walking distance of their homes. You can have compassion for George Floyd and his family (who do not support looting/rioting) and also have compassion for these people.
Bottom line: If you can read this, I probably count you as my friend. My friends are precious to me. I care about them and I care about them building bridges of friendship and understanding with people who look/think differently rather than burning them down. What are you doing with your bridges?
